I was asked the other day what I would tell beginning artists and activists about how to overcome the fear of failure.

This intriguing question brought me back to a project I did years ago. It was a high profile collaborative art installation called, Rise Above Plastics: The Butterfly Effect. There was already media attention on it and our county representatives were talking it up. One way or another it was going to happen.

And I had no idea how I was going to make it!

It was an entirely new way of making art for me, a hanging installation with hundreds of individual pieces. I was so afraid I would fail.

I shared this fear with some folx and was surprised when they turned it around on me and suggested that what I was actually experiencing wasn’t fear of failure, but fear of success.

You see, if we fail, nothing really changes. Look at a baby learning to walk; they fall again and again. When they fail, they just go back to crawling until finally, after failure upon failure, they succeed. If you’re a parent you know that when they finally succeed, all bets are off, everything changes. Their world opens up.

We are born resilient. Failure, while not fun, is a natural and necessary part of growth and development. As an artist, I made a lot of ugly paintings before I was able to paint in a way I really love.

But to succeed? To succeed as an artist or activist? To succeed with our creativity? That is a game changer. When we succeed, the world opens up to us in a way we hadn’t known was possible. And we realize there is no going back. We have a new way of being in the world.

As artists and change-makers, when we share our work, our creativity, with others, it requires real vulnerability. And that is not easy. At least not for me. If there is one thing in this world that I really don’t like, it’s being vulnerable. And if there is one thing that’s allowed me to grow more than any other… it’s being vulnerable.

All of the things in my life that I was the most afraid of doing and being were the ones that I most needed to do. Facing these fears is what allows me to become the most authentic version of myself that I can be.

When I faced my fear of completing Rise Above Plastics: The Butterfly Effect, I succeeded in so many ways. It wasn’t easy, and I really did almost fail while installing the piece.

I remember the first night of the installation, I’d prepped hundreds of pieces of monofilament to attach the butterflies to. Some close friends were helping me tie them onto the frame. We worked for hours and they just kept getting tangled and becoming giant knots. I remember at one point, very late in the night, my friend Rebecca looked at me. She was sitting on the floor with a giant pile of knotted strings in her hands and with tears in her eyes she said, “Carrie, I don’t think this is going to work.”

I called everyone to a stop, thanked them for their help, and sent them home. Then I went around and cut all of the tangles and knots off and found a new way to attach the pieces and ultimately succeeded in creating a hanging art installation that absolutely wowed people. To this day, it is one of my favorite pieces, for so many reasons. Check out this video about the design process and installation here.

It was facing my fears with The Butterfly Effect and completing that project that gave me the courage to leave my day job and pursue art full time. That was seven years ago. And I haven’t looked back since.

The thing about succeeding is this. When we succeed at something that our heart and soul knows we are meant to do,

we no longer get to be small.

It is a recognition to the earth, to the universe, to ourselves that yes, we can do this. We can succeed. We can make a difference. We can be a part of the solution. And that is big.

I’m not saying that fear of failure isn’t real, because it is. And there are some things to consider as you’re beginning something new, no matter what kind of fears you are experiencing.

Start small. You don’t have to do things the way I do, with some gigantic project that you haven’t tried and tested! Take small steps as you build your artistic/activist muscles. Each small success creates a psychological shift in our entire being, making us that much more ready for the next challenge.

When you’re working on something new, it’s ok to keep it close for a while. Nurture it like a baby bird. Creativity requires vulnerability. Choose to share with those who have earned the right to hear about your new creations and ideas; people who will offer support and encouragement. There are those in this world that will try to tear down our creativity, not necessarily out of malice, but out of their own unresolved fears, jealousy, and places in themselves they haven’t nurtured.

Take a deep breath, and just do it. Sometimes, we just have to do the thing! Whether it’s creating a painting, planning an action, or getting up on stage for the first time. If you don’t try, you’ll never know, and worse, you’ll always wish you did.

We all have fear. It is a natural part of being human. So stay human people, invite your fear along for the ride. Just don’t let it drive.

What is a fear that you’ve overcome, or are still working to overcome, in your journey as an artist or activist? Put it in the comments to help others find their way!

Collaborator on Butterfly Effect: Jennifer Johnson @buildingearthfarm