Winter Solstice: A Time of Darkness and Transformation
The winter solstice is a time of darkness, a moment of profound stillness, a pause before the days start to stretch toward the light again. As I sit here, bathed in the low warmth of the winter sun, I am reminded that even in the darkest moments, there is always a stirring within—an anticipation for what lies ahead.
On this cool, crisp day, it’s as if the sunshine warming my skin is lighting my heart. There is an energy inside me, something both quiet and powerful, like an egg quickening within, ready to become something new. The chrysalis of my life is opening, revealing possibilities that I never imagined.
It’s as if I dove into a river on a hot day. The water is crystal clear, and the current swift. I can see all the way to the bottom, catching glimpses of the world beneath the surface—rocks, clay shelves, fish, and leaves swirling in a dance of light and motion. The water is so cold that I am nothing but alive. This clarity, this energy, pulls me forward, reminding me that I am part of something greater than myself.
Shon’s Cancer Recovery: A Personal Miracle
I’ve learned over the past years that life is a gift, and that it’s so precious. As the year turns, I reflect on the incredible milestone that Shon has reached—two years cancer-free. Each day feels like a miracle, a gift that I want to remember, not just on special occasions, but every single day. The journey we have walked together has shaped me, transformed me, and deepened my appreciation for the beauty of life.
The Power of Action: Finding Purpose Through Writing
Yet, in the midst of this gift, I know that we are living in a time of great hardship. From Palestine to Syria, from Congo to our own backyard, there are so many suffering. It is easy to become overwhelmed by the weight of it all, to feel as though joy is impossible when the world is in such turmoil. And yet, despite everything, I find myself happy. Joyous. It’s as though I am living inside the pages of my own memoir—inside the book that I am writing. I’ve heard it said that you write the book you need to read, and that rings so true for me.
As I craft each sentence and bring the themes together within Eclosion: An Artist’s Path to Power and Peace I find myself more and more hopeful. This hope is not a naive escape from reality—it is a hope rooted in action. Writing this book is one way of taking action, of making sense of my life and finding meaning. And that action extends beyond the page. I donate to causes I care about, I call my legislators, I volunteer at my child’s school, I connect with my community, and I get outside to breathe. It’s a hope that moves me forward, through all the darkness.
Writing My Memoir: A Journey of Healing and Hope
Writing this book has been such a different experience than anything I’ve done before. It feels like I’m inside an art piece, and I am creating it with words. As I edit, shift, and expand the narrative, all of these words and images swirl around me, not in chaos, but in harmony. I’m discovering my own story, not just as a writer, but as the person who lived it.
I was talking to Shon the other day, trying to explain what it’s like to be immersed in writing this book. I told him how I’ve been so joyous, so filled with hope lately, and I think it’s because I’m so steeped in the section of the memoir that is all about hope. I am reading it, writing it, and becoming it—all at once.
And so, on this winter solstice, I reflect on the miracle that is Shon’s recovery, on the light that is emerging in my life, and on the possibility that we all have the power to create change, to bring light to the darkness. It was Shon who planted that seed inside of me during a dark and challenging time—the seed that my life has meaning, that I can create change. It took years for that seed to find the light and grow.
In Rebecca Solnit’s must-read book, Hope in the Dark, she says “We inhabit, in ordinary daylight, a future that was unimaginably dark a few decades ago, when people found the
end of the world easier to envision than the impending changes in everyday roles, thoughts, practices that not even the wildest science fiction anticipated. Perhaps we should not have adjusted to it so easily. It would be better if we were astonished every day”. She is referring to social changes that have occurred in our country since the 1960’s, things we never would have thought possible, that today, many take for granted.
Shon’s story is woven with mine throughout my memoir—I would not have become the Artist I am today without him. Each day is a gift. Each day an opportunity to write our own story, to choose hope, to live with purpose. To choose to be astonished by this life incredible life we are creating as we live it.
Global Collaborative Art
Last week I led a monumental collaborative art workshop for a global organization—165 people, from 3 different countries, all working towards sustainability, human rights, and making the world a better place. I went into the workshop with the strangest sensation—light and joy and excitement inside me. Not long ago, I would have been nervous, scrambling to get everything in order, trying to memorize my words. Now I find that I don’t need to memorize anything. All the words are inside me, and they come out when I need them. Such a gift.
Carrie leading a collaborative art workshop for hundreds of people working on sustainability and human rights.
Inviting Reflection: What is Quickening in Your Heart?
As we move through this season of darkness, I invite you to reflect on the stirrings within you. What is quickening in your heart? What potential lies in the silence, waiting to be birthed into the world? What astonishes you today? Each day holds the possibility of something new, and I hope you embrace it with as much wonder and hope as I do.
